breakups...dangerous wicked ground...

how is the right way to break up with someone?
of course there is the classic walk when u start telling your "ideas"... there is the "i have to tell you something" call... and even the ""do you wanna break up?" text or mail...
but what is the right way to do it afterall?
maybe you can start by introducing your idea through several signs like... the small "being away one from another period" (...just to see how it feels). or, you can have long conversations explaining your reasons and diminished feelings. Try always to put the person you're breaking up somewhere in the center of the conversation explaining your reasons so that she/he won't be discouraged in future relationships.
I am asking myself all these questions because I was the one never knowing what to say in such times. I was always the coward telling nothing and running from the place... leaving not to much explanation and a lot of grief behind.
When looking back I feel bad about the way I did it and about the questions left unanswered...
So maybe one of the right way to do it is talking and getting to comon sense... but are we mature enough to do this?
One good advice:
If you are the one making the first step in breaking up... don;t show to much enthusiasm to the dumped person in the following period. If she/he will know that your life is just a blast it will surely cause frustration and "why did the fuck go on with his life so fast" expressions:)
A good way of doing it is trying to protect the "ex-loved" person... whatever they don't know... can't hurt them... and for sure time heals all wounds in the end.
doesn't it?
I think that following at least one of these ideas you can get ride of future obsessions like "i ruined the poor guy(girl)'s life... so how can I live with this as a burden?... I should call him/her".
The worst you can do after a break up is leave things unclear... cause sooner or later those questions will appear.
So what happens when you start asking yourself all these questions and feel guilty about past break ups , while you are involved in a new relationship?
It starts probably with small innocent e-mails to the ex ones... small chats...that get to big issues... when the situations gets off control, you get yourself involved in trying to solve issues that should have been solved at the time being. Probably the conversation get closer than normal... cause in the end you shared a part of yourself with the person...
So what is the end result?
Obviously you get caught by the present partner... you relationship gets into seriouss trouble... and you can't help anymore the ex in distress... cause it's just to late... and in the end.... in the end you get not one problem but two:
1. How can I make up for the shit I caused in my ex realtionship?
2. How do I make the present relationship understand that I mooved on?

So why bother making you life complicated? finish things when it's time to finish them... keep friends and not frustrations... and love like you never loved before.
Although we are so similar... we are so different afterall...
And yes... I said it and I will say it over and over again... we live in a beautiful world... it's just up to us to make it like this...